@breck_pilsner (bokonon84) wrote,

The inevitable outcome of AA meetings

So I'm trying to determine if a GF is going to be worth my while for the long term goal. I'm bound to meet some bat-shit crazies in the halls but whether or not they want the D is another question. My objective was never a wife/kid(s) scenario, at this point, I'm not outside playing dad to a kid.

My genetics are so fucked it should be criminal for me to reproduce. It's only a matter of time before I sterilize the baby batter and get snipped I.e. visectomy.

But being dad to some other chick's kid? Look at the numbers game. I'm more concerned with managing my accounts and making my Twitter handle coherent than negotiating for a consistent price of ass.

And yea, I objectify that situation bc that exactly what I would become to her. A role to fill.

I say fuck it come what may. Not that I'm complaining, I've just stopped caring enough to identify with the normal social standards of age demographic. I haven't had a GF since 2004 (12 years) and I don't do one night stands. But I'm not stupid. I'm just not comfortable bringing anyone into my level of bat-shit crazy over that timeline.

Best case scenario is I hook up with another artist type compatible with my fame chase so we can stunt on social media and rhe "reality" based programming I've brewing in the cook pot. I'm no dummy and I don't chase pussy. The stakes aren't high enough.

I learned early on, early on and my heart is forever broken. My only trust issue is that I trust this bachelor lifestyle with forever be a void of emptiness.

The human condition is so easy to manipulate, why would I dare involve myself to define a relationship with another girl unless I've profiled my own intent first?

I don't need anybody to complete me.

And kids are fucking stupid. They are needy and sheltered and dependant and stinky. No motherfucking arrangement is worth that. I'd rather own a dog.

I wonder what Nala is doing rn

I know, and have always known, since my first job at Hollywood Video, I'm just preparing for a movie role.

But I would trade everything in this life just to know her again, live a 925 and learn to hate myself for it
Tags: tits
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